Wednesday, February 19, 2014
What is the point?!
I am getting no where!
Are you kidding me?
Dammit! When will this end?",
These are the emotionally intense thoughts swimming about in my mind every day for the past week and 1/2.
Recently I lost a substantial amount of money that should have been mine. This money was to be dedicated for plane tickets for my visitation with my sweet children. Unfortunately for them I am divorced and live on another coast (Mostly for my calling in ministry and partially to avoid inevitable confrontations with my ex). I get to see them 75 days of the year and I have not seen them for two months. Though this amount was wrongfully stolen from me; there is nothing I can do from a legal standpoint, and from a Follower of Christ platform I must let go of this bitterness I have towards the offender. This is proving to be quite difficult (especially letting go), and when something like this happens it forces me to add more work hours to my already stressful week. So I am currently scrambling to get more money to fill in the void left by this unforeseen injustice. Through it all I have been thinking that this offense is not my only stress inducer. I am realizing more with each passing moment that this culture, and the "American Dream", is entirely toxic.
The TV and culture says new cars, nice houses, nice clothes, easy meals are the answer. They promised me with their propaganda that their products would ease tension. The truth is that I grow more stressed with each passing day.
I (like many other ignorant young Americans) got into debt at a young age. I purchased new vehicles on credit, paid for things using credit cards. This forces me to barely survive fiscally week to week and because of my ability to make the payments, ruined my credit... for now at least. It will be a while before I can restore my credit and pay off all my debts. This causes me to walk a metaphorical monetary tight rope and my family (mostly my parents) has been my net of safety and helped when I have stumbled.
Then it hit me the number of divorces, domestic violence cases, addictions, and homelessness is increasing annually and it is not that America is becoming "less Christian" it is that this country is becoming more "American". Corporations, and businesses want our money and we want what their products promises (a better life), but at the end of the day we will only have a harder life with more stuff that will eventually turn from "this great new toy" to junk and we have to work even harder to continue paying for it. Many of us do not plan ahead and the moment financial tragedies hit we are lucky to have support, and if we do not than the list of problems listed at the beginning of this paragraph begin presenting themselves in our lives. So what do we do to relieve stress? Buy more stuff!
And round and round we go.
Well I just cannot do it anymore.
I am lucky to be in a community that is searching for a new way of life. I have no solutions as of yet, but I look forward to figuring my way out of "The American Nightmare".
-For The Kingdom